‘Izzy, look. I didn’t come here to make you feel bad or make you hate me. I just thought we should meet and talk a little bit. For sixteen years, I was trying to meet you somehow. Ames, your Mom didn’t want me to. I respected her decision and gave up. But there wasn’t a single day I didn’t think about you. And then, suddenly, you called me. So please, can we spend some time together? You can ask me anything, I will try my best to answer as honestly as I can. Please?’
We went to one café I’ve never been to near my favourite café ever. I didn’t wanna go to my favourite one in case, you know, something happen and then I’ll have some bad memories from there. That reminds me, I haven’t been in my favourite café for a looooooong time. Obviously, since the fire.
‘So? What do you want?’ he asked.
‘Green tea, please.’
‘Okay, go find some place, I’ll bring it.’
‘Are you sure? I can help you with it.’
‘Sure as hell. Look at my muscles.’ I couldn’t help but start laughing because, to be honest, he didn’t have any muscles at all. I found us a nice quite table at one corner of the café and as I was waiting, I had time to investigate my biological father. He’s not very tall, but tall enough, slim, but has this little bump man have when they drink beer and eat chips. He has brown hair and beard and is wearing black jeans, black tee and converse. Wait, I don’t even know what he works as. Is it really my father? Nice, he’s looking at me as I’m examining him. I wonder if he remembers he promised to answer as honest as possible.
‘Green tea for beautiful young lady,’ he puts my tea in front of me. ‘Oh, I didn’t say that, that bartender did and he pointed at bartender looking at us. Not awkward at all!
‘Thanks. What did you get?’ Is this how you make conversation?
‘Black coffee. Wait, you’re not blushing? Because of that bartender?’
‘No. It’s just awkward.’
‘Oh. So, do you have any boyfriend?’
‘No. Do you?’
‘No I don’t have a boyfriend.’
‘Funny, but you know what I mean.’
‘I do have a girlfriend I guess.’
‘I guess. I don’t love her and I know she doesn’t love me. We just don’t want to be alone, so we are together. Does it make sense?’
‘Weirdly, yes. What do you do?’
‘Teaching.’ Wow, I didn’t expect that!
‘What do you teach?’
‘I don’t know if you know this Avalanche School of Performing Arts in London. I teach drums there. Playing drums, playing in band as a drummer and stuff like this.’
‘That’s cool. So you play drums, I guess.’
‘No, I don’t. I just teach.’ What? ‘Kidding! I play, but not in a band anymore. Can I ask you a question?’
‘How’s your Mom? I mean, besides coma and the fire etc. How is she? In life?’
‘As long as I appreciate your honesty, I’m gonna be honest here. She’s doing good, but sometimes she seems like she miss something. Or someone. Do you… Eh… Do you wanna go see her?’ I don’t know why I asked that. What if he says yes?!
‘I’d love to. But I don’t think she’d love it too. Maybe some other time.’ Phew. And then we talked for another hour about my school and London and I didn’t want to ask him more questions because I wanted to meet again.
‘I should go home,’ I said.
‘I’ll drive you.’
‘No, I’d rather walk. Thank for the tea. I had good time.’
‘Me too. Damn it, I hope we stay in touch,’ he smiled and only then I realised he’s my father. He has the same dimple as I do. How could I not notice it?